I love the passing of time

Last night… Bedtime running late as usual. Laptop is not working, so I told the kids that I wasn’t going to sit in by them, as I usually/mostly do, while they’re falling asleep. When I’m sitting in their room, I’m 3 feet away from them. When I’m sitting in the living room, I’m about 10 feet away from them. So, it really shouldn’t be a big deal & I know they’re both capable of dealing with that, having done so before.

But, last night, Shelby was not ready to fall asleep on his own. Too tired, maybe. Too much going on in his day that wouldn’t let him rest. He just wanted a grownup by him while he was falling asleep. He kept getting up for more water, asking me when he could go to the big bed (dad’s night off, last night, so we sometimes stay up late and ‘watch tv ’ ), asking if I would come sit by them, etc. I finally got up & said, with a sigh, “I guess I’ll have to come in there, or you’ll never sleep”. I turned off the DVR recording of Daily Show that we were sitting down to watch. I got a book & a flashlight, then went in & sat down in their room.

Annie fell asleep pretty quick. But, I could tell that Shelby was having a hard time settling down. About 3 minutes into my sitting down, he said “I’m OK, you should go back & watch TV”. I said, “No, I’m 2 paragraphs into this story, now, so I’m going to finish it”.

Still more quiet tossing & blanket adjusting. About 15 minutes into it, after Annie was asleep, I hear a quiet “Mom?” from the bed where he’s sleeping.

I said, “What?”

He said, quietly, “I feel really bad that I made you come in here with me instead of doing what you wanted to do”.

I put the book down & went over to hug him. I said, “You know what, I’m feeling bad that I made you beg me to come in to be by you, when you needed me, instead of just coming in & helping you because I love you”.

I told him that I would finish the story that I was reading, then go out to watch TV with dad. He got up for a drink, potty, then went to sleep.

I’ve got to start trusting that he is empathetic & independent. That he doesn’t ask for help unless he needs it. And, I’ve got to remember how short this time is with the kids & give them what they need when they need it, while I still can.

If I knew how to do a ‘bullet post’, I’d do it now :-p

Girls are at girl scout camp & I’m going crazy wondering how they’re doing. The rules were ‘no cell phones’, but I told Allison that that was clearly intended for little girls who might misuse the phones, chatting with friends instead of doing camp activities & encouraged her to break that rule, just so I’d be able to contact her if I needed to. I’ve been wanting to call ever since the minute I drove away from the camp yesterday afternoon, but have succeeded in not calling, so far. I leave work to pick them up in 15 minutes, so I think I’m going to make it. I hope they’re having fun, though - it’s about 90 degrees out there & they slept on a platform tent under mosquito netting last night.

It’s going to be such a cool memory for the two of them, of this sister bonding experience that they shared…

Shelby’s getting through Cub Scout Day camp alright, too, this week. Hot. Hot, hot hot out there. And, he’s never a big fan of organized activities. But, he’s only having occasional meltdowns there & always comes home with a smile on his face, asking for one boy or another to come back to our house to play.

We’ve got 6 foster puppies right now. They were 5 wks old when we got them last week, so we’ll have them for 2 more weeks. They appear to be mostly lab. And, of course, they are adorable. They are especially cute when you open the half-door gate to get them from the puppy pen in the basement & they all stand up on the short wall there, peering out at you en masse. I’ll try to grab a pic of that later tonight, when Al gets home with the camera

If it weren’t maddeningly entertaining, I might block a couple of people (well, one person) on Y!A. Would that mean that I wouldn’t have to see the mindless crap that she types out there? She’s a mom who says that spanking is a good thing, because she was spanked & she turned out fine. But, I’m not really all too sure about that She never seemed to learn that the needs of other people in the world are just as important as her own. Her baby has to go potty? It’s everyone else’s problem to solve. She wants to get out of her car in a crowded parking lot? Everyone else can just wait for her. etc….

Shelby after boy scout camp yesterday, when another mom & I were talking about maybe meeting at the pool with our boys… “No, I don’t think we should go to the pool. It wouldn’t be fair for Annie who can’t go because she’s at girl scout camp.”

“The people I “picked on” with the exception of Miss Ann who requested her post, are on the whole a bunch of self-centered, retarded, look-at-me, look-at-me attention whores who spend most of their time basking in the non-existant rays of their own brilliance”, said the self-centered, intellectually challenged, look-at-me, look-at-me attention whore who spends most of her(?) time basking in the non-existent (sp corrected) rays of her(?) own brilliance.

To the cub scout mom complaining about the way the 14-yo volunteering his time for your child’s benefit boy scout was running the sports activity at Cub Scout camp. I know that I said “Aww, sounds like he was having a pretty bad day, too” when we were talking about it. But, what I wanted to say was “What if this were your son as a boy scout, 7 years from now, volunteering his time to help out at Cub Scout camp? How would you want the cub scout moms to react to his mistakes & his bad day?”

Allison & Annie are off to overnight girl scout camp, tonight. It’s a ’sisterhood’ camp & it’s just one overnight, then back home tomorrow.

I’ve been worried about how Annie’s going to sleep without me there. She’s only done that a few times & it was always at an aunt’s house - not in a cabin with her big sister.

But, I didn’t want to talk to Annie about it - didn’t want to plant the seed that there’s any reason why she *should* have a problem.

Last night, though, in the kitchen, with Annie in another room, I did have this conversation with Allison…

me: I’m a little worried about how Annie will do at bedtime.

Allison: She’s not bad at bedtime whenever I watch her. Goes right to bed & doesn’t give me a hard time

me: No, I’m not afraid that she’ll be naughty. I’m afraid she’ll be scared.

Allison: Oh, that’s OK. I’ll sleep with her if she wants me to.

:-)

I like that young woman. She’s the best big sister I could hope for, for the kids.