I love the passing of time

Charlotte (we named her that), an australian shepherd (we think) came to stay with us this past Saturday. She’s about 1 or 1.5 years old, they think and she’s due to deliver 4-5 pups in about 1-2 weeks.

For the first 10 minutes, she & Charlie barked & growled. But, we brought them both into the kitchen together, let them sniff at each other while we gave them treats. They’ve been fine since then.

And, besides the occasional urge to herd the cats, and only when they dart past her in a way that makes her instincts take over, she gets along well with them, too.

But, aside from all of that, she is the sweetest dog we’ve ever had. And, she needs a home in a few months

The first night she was with us, we crated her in the kitchen at bedtime. She cried. And cried.

So, we let her out in the kitchen & closed the baby gate to keep her there. She cried. And cried.

Knowing that she was pretty well housebroken by then, we decided to let her have the run of the house for the night. She first followed Jim & I into our room & jumped up on the bed. Clearly, she’s lived with people before, people who loved her & let her sleep on the bed. We put her down & she found her way to Annie (who sleeps on a big cushion on the floor these days). She cozied up beside her & fell asleep until morning - even staying there on the cushion after Annie woke & came to our room in the night.

We knew we couldn’t let her have the run of the house all of the time, especially when we’re sleeping, because we don’t want puppies born on the carpet… So, the next night, I put her in the crate in the kitchen, but, first, put one of Annie’s blankets in there with her. She cried for a couple of seconds when I left the room, but settled down & slept quietly through the night. She does the same, now, too, when she’s sleeping during the day while we’re all out & Jim’s sleeping. In fact, last night, I just opened the crate at bedtime & she went right in to lay down on Annie’s blanket, staying in the crate without my even closing the door (although, I did close it when I went to bed, just in case).

We don’t know anything about her history, besides the fact that she came on a rescue transport from Georgia. She must have had people who loved her, though & who she loved in return. She is so friendly to people and so sad when left alone. She does cringe & cower when we say ‘No’ to her, as if ‘No’ was done harshly in her past, but maybe it’s just because she loves her people so & does not want to disappoint them.

She’s quiet, calm, just wants to hang out with the family. When we let her out with the other litter of puppies that we have, she playfully herds them for a bit, but I’m sure the pregnancy’s taken some of the ‘play’ out of her right now.

Spread the word - if you know anyone who’s looking for a sweet, loving, friendly dog sometime in January, let us know. They can come by & visit anytime.

And, we’ll let you know when the puppies come in the next few weeks, if you want to come by & see some brand new dogs.

I’m co-chair for this year’s fun fair, coming up on Nov 1. Besides the current issues I’m having with a parent who is feeling slighted, misused & treated badly by PTO, who thinks we are awful, mean people who have no manners or human management skills…

But, beside that, one of the things I’m in charge of is collecting donations.

And, I don’t know if it’s compounded by monthly hormonal changes, but every time someone calls me or I call someone & they make a donation or offer us a deep discount, I find myself choking back tears. It’s just so beautiful seeing people helping people and getting to be a part of it all.

I’m a dork

For the past month or so (maybe more), Annie gets panic attacks from time to time when she doesn’t know where I am. I don’t know if this is happening when she’s just with Jim, too.

I figured it would pass. And, it probably will. I keep calming her down, then trying to get her to think sensibly about it. I tell her that I love her and am a responsible person, so wouldn’t leave her without making sure she’s taken care of. I wouldn’t leave the house or yard without telling her who was in charge. And, I tell her to look in all of the obvious places, first, before panicking - kitchen, bedroom, bathroom, basement, front yard, back yard, garage…

She pre-panics, too, if she knows she’s going to be away from us. We’ve been going to church again, from time to time, to the Geneva UU church, because it’s closer - not sure how I feel about our fit with that group, though or about whether it’s worth our Sunday mornings, yet. But, anyway, when it’s time for the kids to go to their religious education classes, she clings & worries. Her eyes well up with tears. “Where will you be when it’s over? How will I find you?” It’s almost like a toddler’s separation anxiety, but maybe worse because she’s old enough & has enough life experience to have real worries that she can imagine & explain, along with others that she just feels & doesn’t have words for and that makes them even scarier for her, because we can’t solve those with logical answers.

After class, she always says how much fun she’s had & has seemingly forgotten her fears. Until the next week.

And, last night, I was talking to her about an email I’d received from a local theater. They were having auditions for a *paid role* in one of their upcoming Christmas productions. The role was for an 8-10 year old girl & she’s tall enough to be able to pull it off. She’s also a bit stagestruck in her mind, but hasn’t had much of a chance to try it out, yet. She wants to be ‘Annie’ from the musical. She wants to try being in plays.

So, even though it would be time consuming for us & hard work for her (she’d still have to go to school, along with the rehearsals & performances), I asked her if she wanted to do it.

She was so conflicted. She did want to do it, she said, but was afraid because she wouldn’t know where we were while she was on the stage. I told her that a parent would have to be there with each of the kids, I’m sure. And, that we would either be back behind the stage or watching from the audience. I also told her that I couldn’t know until we did it, but that I did know we would never leave her until we knew she knew where to find us.

Who knows, maybe she’ll still decide to give it a try. I don’t think she’d get past the auditions, anyway - they’re asking the kids to bring in headshots & resume’s & she hasn’t done anything professional. I doubt she’s got the skillz they’re looking for. It might be fun to try, though.

And, after this morning’s remembering about the truck, I wonder how much of this separation anxiety stems from that - how much of that fear lingers or is just hitting her now.

It was almost a year ago that the man tried to convince Annie to get into his truck.

This morning, at the bus stop, I was standing there chatting with Annie. She heard a beeping noise that sounded like it was a couple blocks away. She looked a bit startled & looking around, said ‘Why is it beeping like that?’.

I explained that it was a truck backing up somewhere - that big trucks make that noise when they are backing up.

She said ‘That other truck did that - you know, that one…’ and, trailed off

I said, “The one that wanted you to get in with him?”

She said, “Yes”

I said that that was some good information to know, that might help the police, because not all trucks do that, only ones that are big enough where they might not be able to see people all around when they’re backing up.

I asked her if it, maybe, made the beeping noise when the driver opened his door to get out, because regular cars & trucks do that, too.

She said “No, it made that sound while it was parking.”

I know it’s a year later, but I’m going to email this info to the police, now, anyway.

I work in the IT department, surrounded here in cubicle land by a variety of young men, all in their 20’s or 30’s, some married, but no kids.

Yesterday, they spent an hour talking about Spore, which is my 8yo son’s favorite, highly addictive video game right now.

Just now, they spent a good 15 minutes talking about praying mantises which they are keeping as pets, sharing all kinds of praying mantis facts with each other. My son’s 2nd grade class learned all about praying mantises a few months ago.

I think my 8yo would really love hanging out with these guys :-p I wonder if they would think that was cool or lame…