I love the passing of time

Now.

Psycho co-workers are talking about how great things are at Gitmo. Making it sound like a resort spa for ‘really bad guys’.

Sigh…

Put headphones on, but can still hear them.

Today is Shelby’s second day having hot lunch. I worked with the school district’s food service office to figure out which foods were safe for him & which weren’t. He was pretty excited about being able to have hot lunch two times a week, like Annie is doing…

Yesterday was the first day. He told me, in the morning, that he wasn’t feeling very confident about it and I decided to work from home so that I could go in & eat lunch with him.

Today is his second day. And, I went into work, 25 min away from home/school.

When Allison got home from school at 11:15 or so (finals week), she got a call from Shelby’s teacher, saying that he wanted me to come in & eat lunch with him. She IM’ed me & told me to call the teacher. I did, but by that time, there was no way I could get to the school by 11:35a for lunch… I talked to Shelby on the phone & let him know how confident I was that he could do it & that he would be safe.

He was holding back tears while talking to me, panicking, afraid.

And there was nothing I could do about it.

And now, I sit, wondering how he’s doing. Wishing I could be there.

I will call his classroom again in a few minutes, to talk to him (it’s like 17 below today - they’re having indoor recess, I’m sure).

The worrying is killing me - the desire to be there beside him.

12:15p - update. I just called him. He said it went fine. His teacher told me, before giving him the phone, that she had asked another student to go sit with him & that probably helped (his best friend is not at school today, for some reason, which, I’m sure, compounded his fears)

Co-workers just got back from lunch. They’re arguing, politely, about Revelation & the Bible & God as if they are real. Actually real. Like God is real and he sat down and wrote a cryptic message that we can figure out and that he controls things in the world and that he has a plan for when the world will end, etc…

It is surreal to listen to

Because she hasn’t replied, after I explained again, thinking that maybe she didn’t understand. So, I hear her outburst, my side of the conversation, but no communication in return. It is maddening. And, I am feeling a little (a lot when I think about it) pissed off about it all. So, another rant here…

WTF? You’re quitting PTO because I said that I didn’t think that kids should have to pay to participate in pajama day. I. Me. Another member just like you. I voiced my opinion. And, you didn’t like it. So, you’re quitting??? Do you not know how to have a conversation?

Or, are you quitting because I suggested that we sell ‘autograph pillows’ to the kids at movie night? And, if so - why? Do you feel differently about autograph pillows? Do you feel that they are a bad influence on children? Do you think that the $4 price I suggested was too much? too little? Do you think we should sell something else? Or, give them away for free?

If you don’t speak your mind, how do you expect the PTO to know it?

Again - if you are not working to make things the way you’d like them in PTO, then you, yourself, are the problem that you are complaining about. If you are not there speaking up, working toward and shaping the ‘direction’ that PTO is going, then it is completely your fault that it is not going the direction that you want it to go in.

Fuck you. I’m in there working on this stuff every day. I see you at, maybe, two PTO meetings every year. Now, you have me second guessing every move. It doesn’t help that *NO ONE* else is replying, either. I know it’s because it’s a busy time of year & they all know me well enough to think that I’ve got it covered. But, because of your outburst followed by silence, I’m not sure whether I should do anything at all for movie night, now… Aaargh!